She's a mirror for my psyche and how She responds and acts is driven so much by what I most need to see and learn about myself.
This morning I was feeling a bit despairing about how long it's taken for Us to get this far and how We seem to backslide so much. She gave me an earworm: some lyrics from The Cars, It's All Mixed Up:
She tricks me into thinkin'
I can't believe my eyes
I wait for her forever
But she never does arrive
That was a theme of my early love life, Hell, most of my love life in that I was always most desirous of women who were unavailable for one reason or another (flighty, previously committed, not really interested).
What I'm seeing is that the delays and setbacks in Penelope's and my coming together fully are on me (which I was fairly clear about previously); but that they are also reflective of some…