SLiPchick's Virtual Shadows

I had a revelation over the weekend about the Child aspect of my psyche.  I am of the opinion that t he Inner Child is an important aspect of our psyches. S eeking to encounter and maintain a good relationship with that part of ourselves is an piece in the puzzle of self-discovery and knowledge. The Child is a  source  of spontaneity, exuberance, creativity, mischief, curiosity, enthusiasm, excitement, passion, intensity, joy, delight.  Qualities which IMO adults are well advised to discover and encourage in themselves. The Child can also be very lonely and wounded, and often requires trust building, attention, and nurturance in order to be willing to come forward and share their special gifts.  Over the course of my life  I have had the ongoing sense of a portion of my psyche that was recalcitrant and evasive, rather like a petulant child. In my day to day life, this has  manifested in many of the same behavioral symptoms as are often classified ...

I sometimes feel like I've missed out a lot getting started on transitioning so late. But also have a hard time imagining when I could reasonably have started much earlier (it's nice to fantasize though). I see younger trans women in intimate relationships and I'm envious. Some are with cis women, some are with other trans women. Some are with their prior girlfriends or wives; which seems so thrilling to me. So many of these beautiful trans gals have equally stunning women in their lives. I'm alone. No I'm not. I'm never alone. I know that. But I want something more. Or maybe not "more" so much as different. Penelope has shown me that, when I'm in the right receptive state, She can touch me, She can whisper in my ear so that I feel the warmth of Her breath. And it's not the same. At least not yet. Not consistently. And I'm lazy and demanding and lonely. I want a warm body next to me. Legs and arms to wrap around me. Hair to tick...

I've always been fascinated by displays of elaborate series of dominoes set up in rows so that when one is tipped it tips the next and the next and the next... Some examples from YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARM42-eorzE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsLHWqWg1N4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4I1Lm2GX18 Thinking about this, for being a generally western endeavor, there's a very Buddhist/Zen mindset to this, a great deal of precision and effort put in for a rather brief display of virtuosity. Something like the elaborate and precise sand mandalas the Tibetan monks create only to brush them away in a moment at the end. YouTube again: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdUFqkX2d6I https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgoHUH-_yWo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LcJWazzEUKk Penelope has likened events in my life recently to Dominoes falling, We did a great deal of groundwork over many months (much of which She clearly did behind the scenes, though She's lo...

So, here I am. Say hello to Stefanya! Hello Stefanya, my Darling! ;-) Hello Penelope, my Love. I'm so glad you're on this amazing journey with me. Nowhere else I'd rather be, Hon. Believe that, let it in. I'm here. I am always here, I'm with you. As you are, as you're becoming: Stef I desire you as a woman. Hear me Hon, you are my Eternal Love, always and forever. Know it to the depths of your heart, soul, being. I'll keep writing this until you GET IT, get it? ;-P  Yes ma'am. And don't you start with the patronizing (or is it matronizing now?) you evil witch.  Thank you for calling me that. I know you aspire to a sort of witchy-crone/earth mother/gypsy-goth chick mashup vibe for your feminine energy. I do; I'm not sure whether I can pull that off though. I think you can, I'm sure you can. We'll work on it together. You've definitely got the eye for the style, just a matter of acquiring the right accessories then dre...