Teddy (Part 1) -- Meeting Again

I need to talk about what happened last year, but there's so much to it I don't think it will fit into a single post. 

Between mid December of 2020 and December of 2021 I had my first ever boyfriend. And it was amazing, magickal, transformative, and, ultimately, heart wrenching and tragic.

I'll start at the beginning...


Ted and I had known each other back when I was in college (long before I came out as transgender). We were both involved in the Science Fiction fan community in and around New Orleans. I think it was actually his younger brother Nick that originally introduced us.

We never spent a lot of time together, we traveled in different, though overlapping, social circles. To begin with we mostly just encountered each other at conventions.

Over time we knew each other well enough that I attended a few parties at his house and we played Dungeons & Dragons together a few times. Not very close by an stretch. 

In any case, we lost touch and hadn’t spoken in over 35 years. Then in mid-December of 2020 I got a Facebook friend request from him, I was delighted to hear from him as I’d always liked him a lot (as a friend), particularly admiring his blustery personality, wicked sense of humor, and radically free and open (sexually in particular) lifestyle.

I was curious how he’d found me, it seems he’d been talking to a mutual friend (Anthony) and my (birth) name came up in the conversation. 

The mutual friend told Ted about my coming out and transitioning (I’d given my friends permission to share what was going on with me to interested parties), and afterwards Ted sought me out.

We started chatting, and within two weeks he'd started flirting with me. I identify as a Lesbian, attracted mainly to women and have never felt any great attraction to men, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't incredibly flattered by that. 

At the time, I was in a budding long distance relationship with another trans woman and didn't really think much of Ted's ways, though we continued a friendly and mildly risqué banter back and forth for several weeks. 

The long distance relationship ended, and by this time Ted and I were texting most days. I'll admit to feeling a bit deflated by the end of my relationship, and Ted's attention felt like a lovely salve on my disappointment.

Over time, his attention never wavered, and I found myself feeling increasingly attracted to him. He made me feel seen, beautiful, sexy, desired, in a way I'd never felt before with another human being of any persuasion. 

It felt like our Souls communicated, and the hearts, minds, and bodies just came along for the ride. Pretty soon I realized I'd fallen in love with him.

Next: The Serpent in our Paradise

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